Leather Skin Biker

As I grew to know faggotjewboy (FJB) better, I came to understand his darkness. In those early weeks of my communication with him, I learned about his penchant for tight leather cop gloves, knife play and gun play, just to name a few. As I’ve already mentioned in previous posts, I also learned of FJB’s true pig nature. I had an opportunity to send FJB on “assignment” to suck off a less than desirable guy while I listened on the phone. Early on, I established my superiority over him, and he understood that quite readily. There was no steep learning curve with this one. It was as if he were built for this kind of relationship.

Right from the beginning, shortly after his first message to me, “nice pic,” I thought there was something different about FJB. One quality I really liked was that he is virtually unflappable. There is virtually nothing that really flusters him, and nothing that I can say or do that is too dark for him. He is squeamish about scat, but nothing else really freaks him out. Plenty of things arouse him, of course. To wit: power, control, darkness, cruelty, coldness, ruthlessness, cheating, lying, pain, objectification, anonymous sex, knives, guns, tight black leather cop gloves, men in uniform, and my darkness.

It was in this context that one day we were chatting online, and I happened to mention “nolimitpigboy” to FJB. FJB had this level of comfort with the concept of snuff that I didn’t quite expect. In fact, it gave him a rock hard boner to talk about snuff fantasies. It was only a small leap for us to personalize that head for FJB. By personalizing it, I mean talking through fantasies in which I am the perp and he is the victim. There were many permutations and combinations involved. Some examples include me holding a loaded gun in his mouth while I fuck him, me holding a cold steel blade to his throat while I fuck him, me backhanding him, me bruising him, me hurting him badly enough to require a trip to the ER. In that scenario I go with him to the ER, and I even go into the treatment area to be with him. The doc would examine him, and ask how he acquired the cuts and bruises, the dislocated shoulder, for instance. “Oh, I fell on the stairs.” I would be sitting there, silent, half hiding a smirk. The doc looks at me, I don’t say anything, or perhaps say something like, “Oh, he’s so clumsy.” Then to FJB, “You really need to be more careful.” Of course, in this fantasy FJB doesn’t own up to what has happened. You get the idea. In these fantasies I’m the perp, he’s the victim, and we both remain rock hard throughout the discussion. There really was a sense of collaboration in building these scenarios, and mutual enjoyment of them.

It was only natural, almost expected, if you consider some of the parallel tracks that were developing concomitantly while I was getting to know FJB, that I would broach the subject of his status. What some might consider the ultimate form of submission had already been put on my radar through my interaction with CLE boy. For all of CLE boy’s dark desire, and submissiveness, there were times when I felt he was just engaging in mental masturbation. Already six months or more had passed, and CLE was fence-sitting, so to say. What appealed to me so much about FJB was his darkness. CLE boy doesn’t dream of being so dark. FJB’s ideations resonated with me, aroused me, fed into my own. There was a strong sense that he was on the same page with me, and had this serious quality about him that I liked.

Let’s face it. In the snuff fantasy head space, the weapon of choice is less important than the end result. The means may be different, but the end is ultimately the same. If you compare loaded revolver to deadly virus, the weapons are different, but long term, the end would be the same—the end. Finis. So when I broached the idea of substituting the virus for the loaded gun, FJB became rock hard. My first thought at the time was that I had another CLE boy on my hands, which is true literally, because they both reside in Cleveland. What I would learn over time is that their city of residence is just about the only thing they have in common. They are two totally different “beasts.” I want to take this opportunity to ensure that my readers don’t confuse the two. Over time, as I relate their respective stories, the differences between FJB and CLE boy will become crystal clear. Stay tuned.

This entry was posted on Friday, May 9th, 2008 at 7:04 am and is filed under Dominance, Power Imbalance, Psychological Control, Submission.