Leather Skin Biker

With all the logistics covered, my head and scatboy’s head in the right place, the time to feed had finally arrived. scatboy’s extraordinary rim service had opened up my hole, relaxed it. I could feel scatboy literally reaching up inside me with his tongue for the log I had prepared for him. At just the right moment, I pushed slowly to move it along toward his hungry mouth. I know that scatboy felt a twinge of excitement when my turd met his tongue on its way toward my hole, because he made an audible sound that confirmed it. As I continued to slowly push it out, he backed his tongue out to allow its passage. I listened closely for confirmation that scatboy, was, in fact, chewing on my turd. When I heard the chewing sounds that confirmed that the process had begun, my head was spinning. There is something amazing about having a bottom eater feeding directly from my hole. I have to stop and process what is happening at that time, and inevitably I find myself asking “Is this really happening?” It’s one of those things that, at least for me, defies belief. The act itself is so contrary to everything that society teaches us about appropriate behavior, that it sometimes seems impossible to believe it is really happening.

Most of us have very deep feelings about defecation and shit. An elaborate training process begun at an early age taught us the protocols for defecating and wiping. We have very specific feelings about when we shit, where we shit, how the process works, and for most of us, specific requirements for the act’s privacy. It has been said that shit is the great equalizer among men, because all men do it. It is primal, animal, and natural. But that does not mean that we naturally feel comfortable shitting in the presence of another person. How many men prefer to find the men’s room empty when they need to take a dump? How many men shit at home with the door closed, in a private world from which even life partners are banned? I’m guessing, quite a few. I would venture to guess that a majority of men prefer to shit in private, and even in public restrooms maintain some level of denial about the sounds and smells that waft under stall walls. Every man knows he hears and smells what is going on in the next stall, but he generally denies it, pretends to ignore it, and never dreams of talking about it.

It is in this complex context of unspoken rules and protocols, deeply held feelings and beliefs that shitsex feels so taboo, so vile, so wrong. The concept of one man eating another man’s waste just defies everything most of us have ever been taught about appropriate behavior. But as scatboy so aptly stated it at the time of our first meeting, “It is so wrong, that it’s right.” At the moment he said that to me the first time, it just clicked. I said to myself, “Yes.” scatboy hit the nail right on the head when he made that statement. It’s true, at least for some of us. Being a man who believes in hierarchy, who embraces power imbalance, who lives in a world where dominance and submission is the ruling paradigm, shiteating appears to be one of the ultimate acts of submission. As I have mentioned, it is intensely intimate, and extraordinarily personal. To think that I will become a part of the bottom eater, literally, is quite heady. To look into the eyes of a man who has eaten my shit is to connect with him on a very deep level, and to know in my gut and in my heart that this man respects and honors me as very few others ever can or will. Therein lies the power of shit.

I am a big fan of permanent, irreversible enslavement. Closely related to that is the idea of permanent and irreversible submission. From my perspective, when a man eats my shit, that represents permanent and irreversible submission, because the act can never be undone. A man cannot un-eat my shit. What is done is done, and nothing can change it. The dom top feeder/submissive bottom eater relationship is intense, intimate and irreversible. One could say that if the feeder and eater reverse roles, or flip, then that would change the dynamic, but I still maintain that no matter what happens later, if a man eats my shit, he is forever submissive to me on some level. These are the thoughts and feelings that go through my head every time I gaze into the eyes of a man who has submitted to me in this very deep and irreversible way. That is what I thought every time I saw scatboy after the first feeding. There was a shared knowledge of the implications of what I did to him and what he did for me that served as subtext for everything else we shared.

scatboy was my second serious submissive bottom eater. leatherscatpig was my first, but he was different in many respects. Chief among the differences is the fact that I spent about 16 hours with leatherscatpig, whereas time spent with scatboy spanned the course of several months. Another major difference was that scatboy fell in love with me, and in all honesty, I with him. scatboy and I interacted very much like boyfriends during the time we shared together. There was a very real sense of caring and trust and warmth between us. It was not just about shit, although that was clearly a significant part of the relationship. As I mentioned in my previous post, I worked hard to try to produce quality shit for him. I altered my diet, stopped drinking coffee for days in advance of the feeding, ate foods that were not well advised for me, because I wanted to produce shit that he would enjoy. It was not all about my pride. No, it was also about my desire to make him happy.

This really points up something that some people misunderstand about dominance and submission. Some believe that the dom in an SM relationship takes, uses, and abuses the sub, but what many fail to realize is that the dom may also love, cherish, protect, and nurture the sub. I have spent the past three years loving, cherishing, protecting, nurturing, and mentoring my slave. I routinely state that he is my most cherished possession, and I mean it when I say it. The point is that love and dominance can and do coexist, and in the case of scatboy, love, dominance, and shit. As I stated previously, scatboy and I did all kinds of things together besides shitsex, and we enjoyed each other’s company, like boyfriends, but with shit as the significant subtext.

To be continued.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 21st, 2008 at 5:55 am and is filed under Dominance, Humiliation, Objectification, Power Imbalance, Psychological Control, Scat, Submission.